Should I Sleep With Him?

The lights are low, the music mellow. He looks at you deeply, passionately, lovingly, and tells you that he's always loved you and doesn't want to live a day without you; that you're beautiful; J-Lo and Kylie have nothing on you, and that girl that you are always paranoid that he fancies? Well, he tells you he thinks she's got dog breath and that he can't stand her. After all…he has you. And that's all he's ever wanted. And now he wants to show you…he takes you by the hand and leads you to his room.

And then you wake up. And absolutely nothing has changed. Fanflippingtastic.

Because that's the way we want IT to happen, the way given the chance we wanted IT to be. And yes we know that we are lovely bootylicious ladies who are free to do our thang morning, noon and night, but somehow we can't stop wanting sex to mean love and can't help but feel a bit disappointed when what you thought was making love was actually about having sex. Just sex. Somehow we end up singing Ashanti's "Foolish", rather than the Sugarbabes' "Freak like me".

So come on girlfriend, is it love or is it sex? And does he think so too?

Here's a little test for the next time Mr. "Right Now" comes along…what is it that really matters?
Is it the clothes he wears, the reputation he has, the need to feel popular and sexy?
Are you feeling more confident or more insecure?
Will sex really mean that you get to keep him?
Does it prove you are a woman now? And do you care anyway?
Does it matter if it's making love for you and just sex for him?
Does it matter if he won't stay around if you needed him?
Does it matter if he doesn't love you?

And - does it matter if you don't love him, if you are using him? That's a tough one…. and we're not giving the answers, just asking some questions….you decide.

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